At Least You're Wearing Pants: Every Six Months: How to Never Get Bored in a Relationship

The Action Jacksons

In the course of my two years on the job, proud parenting moments come easy: that first gummy smile, our first "conversation," hearing her count to ten in Spanish ("neve- des!"), and most recently, the first pee pee on the potty. Face to face as her little butter-cream bottom hangs over the toilet, belly spilling over her knees, I heard the first sound... of... wait for it... tinkle! I am in awe of this surge of growth and independence. Despite our best efforts to keep her as little as possible for as long as possible, I know, because I have a two-year-old, that I don't make the decisions anymore. Underwear is on and diaper is off. It's more proof - adorable proof- that this determined, lead-the-charge child definitely belongs to us.

Our winter trip to California swept us away from our to do lists and into the warm sunshine. I even found myself gayly kicking crumbs under the cabinets in anticipation of the daily maid service. Whee! Over several happy trips to our favorite ramen house, where we watched Nug learn to "use" chopsticks, we reflected on where life has taken us since we left California. Err, well, where we've taken our determined and lead-the-charge selves. In between slurps of noodles, we realized a funny (not funny-haha, more funny-psycho) pattern in our relationship: since we met six years ago, we've made major life decisions every. six. months. Insanity! My mom always says that I should write a book, so here's my first title: Every Six Months: How to Never Get Bored in a Relationship!

January 2007: W and I meet in San Francisco (where I was living; she was living in NYC). July 2007: I put all of my belongings in storage, say goodbye to my home and friends of the last six years, and move to NYC to be with W (via a short-term travel nurse position). February 2008: After some soul-searching (i.e. living with my parents, running a half-marathon, and sewing a quilt at 3am), I return to live in NYC permanently. This scares the crap out of me. October 2008: W is offered a job in California. It's a promotion and a chance for me to get out of NYC, but a huge gamble on our new relationship. She packs up her life of 38 years and moves west for the first time ever. This scares the crap out of her. Oh, and why stop there? We buy a house within the first month. INTERMISSION: Here we take a one year break to familiarize ourselves with the gay bars of our new town, gain ten pounds, and shop at outlet malls. November 2009: We jump back into things in a big way: W proposes to me via a faux invitation to our wedding. I throw it across the table like a spider and scream. Eventually I say yes. April 2010: Hold on tight to your britches now, I'm pregnant with Nug after the first try. September 2010: Our wedding in Connecticut. February 2011: Nug is born. October 2011: We move across the country again for W's job and, after learning that it would cost $6000/mo to extend our stay in the company-sponsored apartment, we purchase a home we kinda like one month later. June 2012: The home we kinda like is under construction for six of our first eight months living there. When we finish the remodel in June, we wipe dust off the floor and each other, sit back with a beer, and realize that now we kinda love it. And we haven't moved since. Hallelujah.