Sixty!
And just when you thought the stretch pants, Netflix bingeing, and midday drinking had become a permanent part of your life -or was that just me?- our governments have announced... "Phase Two."
Ok, Phase Two! So let's open the music stores; they don't exist anyway! Ha! But whatever Phase Two brings, it feels good to talk about moving forward. The Not-Knowing phase was difficult and depressing. My years as a stay-at-home-mom made me patient, creative, and very tolerant of sharing personal space, but they did not prepare me to live as if shipwrecked on an island (a well-equipped island, admittedly) with no plan for escape!
But, life on our island is actually really great and I've grown quite cozy here. The side garden is finally planted, the bathroom grout is sparkling, our fridge is full, I have a stack of puzzles, and the kids still think I'm awesome. So while I look forward to one day hugging people, and traveling, and letting the kids pick up treasures they've found without fear of transmitting a virus, Phase Two means we may actually heave-to (is that too many ship metaphors?) and our snug home will open its doors again. What will be in store for us out there? How has the world changed beyond our shores? How have WE changed?
So today, before those doors open, and on my 9th Mother's Day, while Nug is making pancakes for her moms and Cookie is well... watching tv, I'm taking stock of our surroundings.
Some things I've longed for:
The energy of friends, their hugs and smiles.
Nug's first year of swim team and volleyball.
Camping, especially the two Girl Scout trips we had planned.
My waistline. I've spent a few too many days drinking and chocolate-ing with my puzzle.
Time with grandparents.
My housecleaning service.
The kids' friendships and school. The field trips and projects they've missed.
The public library! I have so many great books on hold.
A schedule. Not in 10+ years have I slept until 8am. This is weird.
And then there all the treasures we've found. These are my favorites:
The kids riding bikes for hours. Cookie graduated to her bigger bike, overcoming a fear she's held for at least a year. She's covered in scrapes, and keeps asking for more.
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| This doesn't even show her elbows. |
Life lessons at the river. We've found dead fish and squished out their eggs, large animal bones, nests and nests of gorgeous goose eggs, large families of goslings, a lizard tail, mental illness, encounters with Parks Officers, ticks on the dog, and the courage to take cold plunges.
A sister bond that seems to grow every day, and a corresponding number of matching jumpsuits to prove it. Among all the songs and skits and doll hair styles they've created, they have learned to work with each other peacefully and respectfully (90% of the time). One night they set the dinner table while linked arm in arm. They literally had to work as one.
Nug's love for reading, at least for reading Harry Potter. Never in her life has she sat so still for so long, without coercion.
New habits: nightly family walks, eating at home, baking our own bread, keeping your desk clean, drinking two cups of coffee (ohp! how did that slip in there?!)
Little life how-to's: how to vacuum, load the washing machine, ride a bike over a jump, sweep the front porch, remove a tick, dye your hair, make your bed, address an envelope, identify flowers, dial into a Zoom video call (lol)
A new importance for rituals. I have never been one for traditions, but I understand and respect them now. We recently celebrated International Guide Dog Day, just to break up the week, and it was a totally memorable highlight. As was the homemade piñata on Cinco de Mayo! It dropped packaged Corn Nuts and cookies and a whole lot of fun.
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| Dog was not so sure about the piñata. |
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Now that rescue is looming, or at least on the table for discussion, I'm thinking about how I can take these sweet family treasures with me. I came across a new blogger, a former Foreign Service worker who has seen her share of resource scarcity and illness, and I'm finding comfort in her words. This post helped me outline how I might carry over my Shelter-in-Place lessons into my Phase Two life. What have I learned about my personal values in the last two months?
What I Love
I've learned that I love the dial turned down low. I love slowness: the speed of walking over driving. - I love quiet time to focus on one activity (how novel after the multi-tasking extreme which is parenting!). - I love the flexibility of my job.
What I hate; What worries me?
I hate that I can't interact with friends. I didn't have many to begin with, but the few I had were growing stronger. I miss seeing faces at school pick up. I miss plopping my lawn chair down next to a friend at the kids' soccer games. I miss all the smiles and nods at our neighborhood events. - I also don't like the kids learning via computer screens. I've accepted it, but I'd rather teach them how to whittle wood or mend a hole.
What brings me joy; What am I good at?
Watering my plants and standing among their beauty brings me so much peace and happiness. - I enjoy W's bright laughter, her outlook, and steady companionship. - I am good at teaching my kids in creative ways and keeping it fresh. They may say otherwise because they don't know otherwise, but fairy houses, doll clothes, and marble art have all come out of our production line. - I'm pretty good at saying yes to them; we hit the river A LOT. From Nug's Mothers Day card: "One other great thing about you is best because you bring me to the river a lot."
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| I love my quiet time in the garden. Typing this post out. |
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I will leave you with this, a poem/video that says everything I am thinking. Please enjoy! Transcript is below, because it's worth a full marinade.
by TomFoolery Probably
-Tell me the one about the virus again. -
It was a world of waste and wonder. Of poverty and plenty.
Back before we understood why hindsight's 2020.
You see, the people came up with companies to trade across all lands. But they swelled and got much bigger than we ever could have planned.
We'd always had our wants, but now, it got so quick.
You could have anything you could dream of, in a day, and with a click.
We noticed families had stopped talking. That's not to say they never spoke. But the meaning must have melted and the work life balance broke.
And the children's eyes grew squarer and every toddler had a phone.
They filtered out the imperfections but amidst the noise, they felt alone.
And every day, the skies grew thicker til you couldn't see the stars.
So we flew in planes to find them, while below, we filled the cars.
We'd drive around all day in circles. We'd forgotten how to run.
We swapped the grass for tarmac, shrunk the parks, til there were none.
We filled the sea with plastic because our waste was never capped. Until each day when you went fishing, you'd pull them out, already wrapped.
And while we drank, or smoke, and gambled, our leaders told us why
it's best to not upset the lobbies, more convenient to die.
But then, in 2020, a new virus came our way.
The governments reacted and told us to hide away.
But while we all were hidden, amidst the fear, and all the while. People dusted off their instincts, they remembered how to smile.
They started clapping to say thank you. And calling up their mums. And while the car keys gathered dust, they would look forward to their runs.
And with the skies less filled with voyagers, the earth began to breathe.
And the beaches bore new wildlife that scuttled off to the seas.
Some people started dancing, some were singing, some were baking.
We'd grown so used to bad news, but some good news was in the making.
So when we'd found the cure, and were allowed to go outside,
we all preferred the world we found to the one we'd left behind.
Old habits became extinct and they made way for the new.
And every simple act of kindness was now given its due.
-But why did it take a virus to bring the people back together. -
Well sometimes you have to get sick, my boy, before you start getting better.
Now lie down my boy and dream of tomorrow, and all the things that we can do. And who knows, if you dream hard enough, maybe some of them will come true.
We now call it The Great Realization, and yes, since then there have been many. But that's the story of how it started, and why hindsight's 2020.
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